My Due Date is Fast Approaching!


Your probably wondering why I haven’t told you that I’m pregnant.
Honestly, I am not in the traditional sense. But, very shortly I will give birth to my baby: I have imagined her since I was a little girl, and she will be delivered not only to me soon, but to the world! It seems like it is taking forever for her to arrive because I am really trying to deliver! I mean deliver the kind of content that makes you keep coming back for more, deliver tips, advice, news, and how-to’s that you can relate to, and deliver the very best I can to help you live more confidently and fabulously!
It has been a long process full of ideas, creation, revisions, brainstorming, and time commitments. But, it is all worth it in the end. When she, my new site, is delivered I will let you know. We are a few days away from the due date. LOL….seriously!
Sneak peak of one of the new banners below (please do not copy or share):


Artist: Jade Pilgrom

Stay tuned,


5 Life Lessons Beyonce’s Documentary Reminded Me Of


I finally caught the replay of Beyonce’s highly anticipated documentary, Life is a But a Dream. It was so powerful I just had to write about it. As I watched I felt moved by Bey’s vulnerability and honesty in regards to her life and experiences. It takes a strong woman to disclose such personal information in a way that is both tasteful and non-intrusive to her life. There were so many aspects of that she shared that connected me instantly.

Whenever I see great women speak I always feel an instant connection of spirits. As I know deep inside that I was meant to be great just as them. After watching I was overcome with emotion because Beyonce reminded me of some of the best life lessons I’ve learned too, and ones that all woman should learn as early as possible. So here they are:

1.Everyone has a purpose and can be great

It is evident that Tina and Matthew Knowles cultivated their baby’s gifts and talents early in life. Hence, the reason why she is a powerhouse to be reckoned with now. Imagine if all parent’s did this. It reminded me of how thankful I am that my mother always did the same for me.
Beyonce’s drive and passion for her work is directly linked to the fact that she has found her purpose in life, and has worked her tail off to be great. To be the best. Now, that is genius right there.

2.You create the life you want to live

Beyonce lives a beautiful life but only because she created it. She envisioned it and then she lived it. She has people around her that also speak to and pray to her ability to be great. Beyonce appeared to be very strategic about living even so much so that she even mentions that she always struggle with figuring out how much she should reveal. Strategic thinkers create the life of their dreams. How are you thinking about your life at the present moment?

If this isn’t the best life lesson I’ve ever learned then I don’t know what is. Not quite sure where I learned this for the first time but it is the most important one in my book.

3. You must take risk even at the cost of losing people, places, or things

Beyonce took a risk when she let her father go to become independent. Letting her father go was painful for her, but she also recognized how valuable being independent was for her. She gained an even greater appreciation for him once she realized how great a job he did preparing her to be a business woman.  In the end her risk taking resulted in making a  decision that was necessary and needed in order for her to grow into the woman she is today.

4.To whom much is given, much is required

This is a life lesson I also learned early on because this is the story of my life. Beyonce felt the same way. No doubt, she is super blesse,d but as a result so much is expected of her. This is why she is constantly slammed and praised in the media for her every move. Can you imagine living your life in the public eye like her? I know I couldn’t.

5. Telling your own story and truth is very powerful

Instead of hearing the tabloids and he said, she said Beyonce telling her own story on her own terms was a powerful force! Hearing her truth from her lips help me to connect to her as a woman and as a human being. I could feel what she was saying as opposed to reading a headline declaring something about her.

Telling your story heals you and it also connects you with others which was her intention. She reminded me of the tremendous power womanhood has and the beauty of being an imperfectly perfect human being.

What lessons were you reminded of or learn for the first time?

*P.S. New website is almost finished! Will post details as soon as it is finished.*

We’re Moving!

Regal Realness will be moving to a new site shortly. Therefore, no new content will be posted here from this point forward. All content from here will be available on our new site with a host of other great new things in store for you! Check back for the new location launch in a few weeks!!!

Are you a blogger or woman with something to say?


Regal Realness wants to hear your voices ladies!

Send in submissions on topics that you believe will inspire, empower, and uplift other women of color to be fabulous and empowered! Categories include:  Beauty, Confidence, Love, Hair & Health, Culture, and Fabulous Living. Send all submissions to Submissions will be responded to in a timely manner with comments regarding editing/publishing.

Submission Guidelines:

-Submit post in a word document (size 12 font, Times New Roman)

-Post should be between 400-800 words

-Write 1-2 sentences that discuss why you think this is a good fit for Regal Realness readers

-Include one resource that readers can use to make their lives better that compliments your post (ie. worksheet attachment, Youtube video, link to a survey, link to a book they can purchase, list of something, chart or diagram, etc) This will be called a , Regal Resource.

Note: All submissions if approved will be posted on our new website.

Why Does She Always Get the Happy Ever After?


The Happy Ever After Girl Defined

You know the type got it going on, nails done, hair done, everything did, always smiling, gets the good guys, gets the baby or the ring before others, her Facebook never has a dull moment, her Twitter account is on fire, always getting opportunities, always seems to be on to something good! Homegirl is working it, and doing it well. Jealously sometimes creeps in there if your life may not seem as glamorous! Of course, this varies!!

But, why does she always get the happy ever after you might ask? Is she better than you?

Well, I’m here to tell you that so-and-so is NOT better than you.

So-and-so is not smarter then you, more beautiful then you, more blessed then you, or more favored then you. Nope!

Why Her?

She always gets the happy ever after for one reason and one reason alone: BECAUSE SHE BELIEVES SHE DESERVES IT! She believes she is worthy and regal. She believes she deserves the best and will not settle for less. She hustles and works hard for the life she has whether it brings good results or bad results.

What  “HAPPY EVER AFTER” women share (no we’re not talking fairytales here, Cinderella especially!) are solely their BELIEFS in how they believe their life should go! Our thoughts are in direct relation to the life we lead!

What Does the Happy Ever After Girl Think About?

  • What are your thoughts saying about the life you lead?
  • What is your life saying about the thoughts you’ve had?
  • Have you came up with a vision for the way your life should be? Have you worked that vision so it becomes a reality?

Getting to happy means you get into you FIRST!

Getting to Happy

While you’re wondering why she is “HAVING IT ALL” and “LIVING IT UP” she is living her life like it’s golden while you’re sitting around jealous, bitter, angry, (or even just settling for less) instead of getting the life you want!

The happy ever after girl once thought she could, and then she went after it that makes her seem so envious! Instead of envying her see what she is doing. “Success leaves clues (Tony Robbin) my friend! Be mindful and cautious of course when following. But do take note!

Go from jealous to joy. Go from envy to excited. Go from bitter to bold.

By ENVISIONING WHAT YOU WANT  (make a vision board) and then GO GET IT (Mary Mary Voice)!!!!

Are you a Happy Ever After Girl? 


9 Ways to Tell If You Are a Confident Woman


Are you the woman that men love and women admire (sometimes envy)? Find out if you got what it takes to be seen as a confident woman. The type that little girls want to emulate and grown woman want to celebrate and collaborate with! This my friend is when you have achieved Regal Realness. Have regal are you?


1. You know your worth

You recognize that you are REGAL. A woman who is worthy of all good things: good life, good men, good food, good jobs, good shoes, good blessings, etc.

2. You accept yourself flaws and all

You have accepted your REAL self. You know you are not perfect. You know you are flawed yet still beautiful and worthy. You know that your failures, setbacks, mistakes, and past hurts do not define you. Yet, you embrace them, forgive them, heal yourself from them.

3. You look in the mirror and smile

When you look in the mirror you see beauty. You see the most beautiful girl in the world. You are not complaining or fussing in your head or aloud. And if it has to do with your weight, you have recognized that “when you love yourself, your weight will take care of itself.” Thus, you don’t focus most of your time in the mirror on any flaws you may have.

4. You see other women as collaborators rather than competition

You recognize that there will always be someone better then you. But, you don’t see other woman as competition rather you compliment them on their success, and instead seek to collaborate with them and use their talents, strengths, and abilities to enhance your own and vice versa.

5.  You inspire others to want better

When you start inspiring other men and women to want better lives, and to think more highly of themselves then you are empowering people to be more confident.

6. Your presence is obvious and noticed

People recognize you when you speak or enter a room and say no words. A man can recognize your regal realness without you saying a word. This attracts him because he knows he will have to work harder to get a woman who knows who she is and what she wants out of life. If you are unforgettable in a positive way…you are glowing from the inside out!

7. You attract good men

You notice you attract new kinds of men to you. You attract ones who are serious, committed, loyal, respectful, romantic, and possibly interested in marriage. You also recognize how comfortable you are in the presence of men and while in relationships.

8. You take pride in your appearance

You walk out of the house fierce and fly. You rock your own unique style, and you own it! You don’t look run down, sloppy, or all over the place. It is evident you out thought into what you were going to wear, and you put effort into doing your hair for the day. You can tell you love your hair by its baeauty and care. You recognize your body type and pair it with your own style, and dress accordingly. Often times making a fashion statement.

9. You are living your dreams

You are  working towards or living out the life you have always dreamed of. You may help others build their dreams, but you also invest quality time in your own dream or hustle!

What other traits would you add to the list?






Scandal: Why More Women of Color Need to be Running the Show


It has been so refreshing and also in some ways weird to watch Kerry Washington as Olivia Pope on a major, mainstream television show watched by millions of all backgrounds. Don’t get me wrong I have seen plenty of shows with mostly cast of color with a leading lady of color, but a major television show like Scandal is a little different. The fact there hasn’t been one since the sitcom Julia in the early 1970’s is mind blowing. Honestly, it is scandalous that this is even a fact. It took that long!


Notable for being one of the first weekly series to depict an African American woman in a non-stereotypical role

Another fact is that Olivia certainly represents for the ladies! She represents an authenticity that is unparalleled to any other show starring a black woman that I’ve ever seen. Additionally, she shines with such regal realness in every scene which leaves viewers like, “Well, damn Liv!”

Olivia’s presence is so powerful. We need her on there moving and shaking through DC. We need more women of color on major television shows period! Olivia cannot be our only example, although she is a damn good one. Little girls, teen girls, and real woman with or without color need to see themselves as powerful, regal, and in control of their lives like Liv. Just look at her: olivia-pope-scandal-kerry-washington

Too often we hear all of the negatives attributed to women, and in the age of reality TV we sometimes can get the WRONG ideals of what it really means to be a lady, to be professional, to be beautiful without showing all of your body, to handle situations without a brawl and throwing the b-word, to show oneself as multitalented and to be damn good at what we do that doesn’t involve sex, money, drugs, or being fame hungry!

Shonda sure can write! But, Shonda wasn’t the only one gifted with this talent. You might have it in you to write the next great show starring a leading lady of color. Not sure if I have it in me. But, I have always dreamed of having my own television network for women of color that had programming just for us. A show like Scandal would be on the line up. But, would people even watch?

People have been so accustomed to shows like Basketball Wives that a network with regal woman doing real things in a positive way may not make the cut. It may be too boring! At least this is what viewers say in regards to positive programming on BET that consistently gets very low ratings!

realityaired.comBasketball Wives LA
Basketball Wives LA

When will we break out of this World Star Hip Hop mentality where it is okay to be a basketball wife with no husband, or in a street brawl that is posted on the internet, or even put others down just to obtain 15 seconds of fame on TV. All of that nonsense is ignorance at its best. This seems more like the show is running you versus you running your own show.

Real living comes from knowing who you are and owning that. Olivia Pope is my definition of a regal realness woman who rocks all that she got. She knows she is worthy, but she is not perfect…none of us are. Although the show is entertainment (just like the others mentioned) what we choose to feed ourselves on a daily basis it what we become. I choose to be Ms. Pope any day over the other nonsense I see. More women of color on the little and big screens is needed, necessary and long overdue!

SignatureWhat do you think?

Ready to Live Life Like It’s Golden in 2013


At this particular point in my life I am ready to kick some ass! No, not like that…but like that! Like I am ready to stop making excuses, punch fear in the face, and kick ass into gear…making the next year of my life the best year of my life.

I am sick and tired. Sick and tired of letting fear guide what I do and don’t do. Fear is a you know what. Quite frankly, it pisses me off. I am ready to kick it to the curb for the time being. I am ready to make some changes.

Surviving just doesn’t get it for me. I need to thrive. I need to feel like I put in my very best. I need to feel like I have enough and more to give to others…now that is thriving. Like Maya says do it with STYLE!

I give you permission right now. If I look the same a year from now. If my hair is the exact same. If I am the exact same way in one year in any area of my life….please kick my you know what because that means I did absolutely nothing to achieve my goals and witness my dreams unfold. Honey, I am declaring it now. In 2013 I will be living my life like it is golden-er. My life is already pretty sweet…I am pretty blessed and favored, but there is still more that I envision for myself. Where I am now is only the beginning.

I am currently clipping pictures and words from magazines in order to create a vision board for myself!!! In fact, I am hosting a vision board challenge with other women who would like to also create boards and be reminded daily to go after their dreams! Sign up if you are up for the challenge

Surviving is easy. Thriving is hard work. It is patience. It is having time to have style. It is passion on fire. It is humor at its best. I am ready to kick all of my fear’s ass and step into an even better ME! Whoa! I am getting excited just talking about it. This time next year you will witness many before and afters from me because I do not plan on being the same EXACT me I am right now.

2012 brought me so many choices, changes, and challenges that led to greatness and important growth! Now, I am looking forward to using my growth season from 2012 to be my grind season in 2013. 2013 you will find me on my grind in every area in my life! Mark my word…a golden life I shall live (in my Jill voice of course)!!!


Will you live life like it’s golden in 2013?

Join 2013 Vision Board Challenge!!!



You are invited to the event of the year! Regal Realness is hosting its first REGAL GIRL CHALLENGE! The purpose of this challenge is to bring women of color together for a common cause that in turn helps them make their lives better! As we exit 2012 and welcome 2013 I want to ensure that you are entering this next year on the right foot, with a vision in my mind and goals set in place.

There is no reason why you can’t have the life you have always dreamed of and more! Zora Neale Hurtson said it best, “There will be years that question and years that answer.” I want 2013 to be your year that answers! Your year of YOU!

Your year to get your money right, the man of your dreams or improve your relationship, make a stronger connection with your faith, your year to finish school, get a promotion, or start a new career. Whatever it may be that you need. I want to be sure that you and I get it! You deserve it lady!

So…do you believe in The Secret? According to The Secret, which involves the law of attraction is the belief that everything that you want is possible if you envision it first. It follows the cliché: If you can see it, you can be it, if you believe it, you can achieve it. Therefore, if you are a believer then I hope you accept my invitation.


When: December 15, 2012 – December 15, 2013
Where: Online

What is a vision board?

A vision board is a collage of images, pictures and affirmations of your dreams and desires.

How does this challenge work?

1. You sign up for the challenge here:

2. Create your vision board (Dec 15-Dec 31, 2012) and send it to me: Board will be posted on our site: as a form of accountability to remind us of the visions we have for the year.

Materials Needed: Make it online, with Microsoft Word or PPT, or use a poster board with magazine clippings, markers, pictures, etc

Board Categories: Health, Finances, Relationships, Career/Work, Dreams/Passions, Social Life, etc

3. Make vision board your desktop background or put it in a highly visible place in your house/bedroom/office

How do I accept the challenge and sign up?

Sign up here:

*Giveaway opportunity, too*

How will I make my vision a reality?

You will get an e-mail once a month with a task to remind you to view your board and take action.

Grab button if you have a blog or website too!

Grab button if you have a blog or website too!
See sidebar for code.


Also, read Do you believe in The Secret? Making 2013 the Year of YOU!!! for more on the Secret and sample vision boards!