Why Does She Always Get the Happy Ever After?


The Happy Ever After Girl Defined

You know the type got it going on, nails done, hair done, everything did, always smiling, gets the good guys, gets the baby or the ring before others, her Facebook never has a dull moment, her Twitter account is on fire, always getting opportunities, always seems to be on to something good! Homegirl is working it, and doing it well. Jealously sometimes creeps in there if your life may not seem as glamorous! Of course, this varies!!

But, why does she always get the happy ever after you might ask? Is she better than you?

Well, I’m here to tell you that so-and-so is NOT better than you.

So-and-so is not smarter then you, more beautiful then you, more blessed then you, or more favored then you. Nope!

Why Her?

She always gets the happy ever after for one reason and one reason alone: BECAUSE SHE BELIEVES SHE DESERVES IT! She believes she is worthy and regal. She believes she deserves the best and will not settle for less. She hustles and works hard for the life she has whether it brings good results or bad results.

What  “HAPPY EVER AFTER” women share (no we’re not talking fairytales here, Cinderella especially!) are solely their BELIEFS in how they believe their life should go! Our thoughts are in direct relation to the life we lead!

What Does the Happy Ever After Girl Think About?

  • What are your thoughts saying about the life you lead?
  • What is your life saying about the thoughts you’ve had?
  • Have you came up with a vision for the way your life should be? Have you worked that vision so it becomes a reality?

Getting to happy means you get into you FIRST!

Getting to Happy

While you’re wondering why she is “HAVING IT ALL” and “LIVING IT UP” she is living her life like it’s golden while you’re sitting around jealous, bitter, angry, (or even just settling for less) instead of getting the life you want!

The happy ever after girl once thought she could, and then she went after it that makes her seem so envious! Instead of envying her see what she is doing. “Success leaves clues (Tony Robbin) my friend! Be mindful and cautious of course when following. But do take note!

Go from jealous to joy. Go from envy to excited. Go from bitter to bold.

By ENVISIONING WHAT YOU WANT  (make a vision board) and then GO GET IT (Mary Mary Voice)!!!!

Are you a Happy Ever After Girl? 


Ready to Live Life Like It’s Golden in 2013


At this particular point in my life I am ready to kick some ass! No, not like that…but like that! Like I am ready to stop making excuses, punch fear in the face, and kick ass into gear…making the next year of my life the best year of my life.

I am sick and tired. Sick and tired of letting fear guide what I do and don’t do. Fear is a you know what. Quite frankly, it pisses me off. I am ready to kick it to the curb for the time being. I am ready to make some changes.

Surviving just doesn’t get it for me. I need to thrive. I need to feel like I put in my very best. I need to feel like I have enough and more to give to others…now that is thriving. Like Maya says do it with STYLE!

I give you permission right now. If I look the same a year from now. If my hair is the exact same. If I am the exact same way in one year in any area of my life….please kick my you know what because that means I did absolutely nothing to achieve my goals and witness my dreams unfold. Honey, I am declaring it now. In 2013 I will be living my life like it is golden-er. My life is already pretty sweet…I am pretty blessed and favored, but there is still more that I envision for myself. Where I am now is only the beginning.

I am currently clipping pictures and words from magazines in order to create a vision board for myself!!! In fact, I am hosting a vision board challenge with other women who would like to also create boards and be reminded daily to go after their dreams! Sign up if you are up for the challenge

Surviving is easy. Thriving is hard work. It is patience. It is having time to have style. It is passion on fire. It is humor at its best. I am ready to kick all of my fear’s ass and step into an even better ME! Whoa! I am getting excited just talking about it. This time next year you will witness many before and afters from me because I do not plan on being the same EXACT me I am right now.

2012 brought me so many choices, changes, and challenges that led to greatness and important growth! Now, I am looking forward to using my growth season from 2012 to be my grind season in 2013. 2013 you will find me on my grind in every area in my life! Mark my word…a golden life I shall live (in my Jill voice of course)!!!


Will you live life like it’s golden in 2013?

Join 2013 Vision Board Challenge!!!





You are invited to the event of the year! Regal Realness is hosting its first REGAL GIRL CHALLENGE! The purpose of this challenge is to bring women of color together for a common cause that in turn helps them make their lives better! As we exit 2012 and welcome 2013 I want to ensure that you are entering this next year on the right foot, with a vision in my mind and goals set in place.

There is no reason why you can’t have the life you have always dreamed of and more! Zora Neale Hurtson said it best, “There will be years that question and years that answer.” I want 2013 to be your year that answers! Your year of YOU!

Your year to get your money right, the man of your dreams or improve your relationship, make a stronger connection with your faith, your year to finish school, get a promotion, or start a new career. Whatever it may be that you need. I want to be sure that you and I get it! You deserve it lady!

So…do you believe in The Secret? According to The Secret, which involves the law of attraction is the belief that everything that you want is possible if you envision it first. It follows the cliché: If you can see it, you can be it, if you believe it, you can achieve it. Therefore, if you are a believer then I hope you accept my invitation.


When: December 15, 2012 – December 15, 2013
Where: Online

What is a vision board?

A vision board is a collage of images, pictures and affirmations of your dreams and desires.

How does this challenge work?

1. You sign up for the challenge here: http://tinyurl.com/af97hfk

2. Create your vision board (Dec 15-Dec 31, 2012) and send it to me: regalrealness@gmail.com. Board will be posted on our site: http://wp.me/P2wE3p-aG as a form of accountability to remind us of the visions we have for the year.

Materials Needed: Make it online, with Microsoft Word or PPT, or use a poster board with magazine clippings, markers, pictures, etc

Board Categories: Health, Finances, Relationships, Career/Work, Dreams/Passions, Social Life, etc

3. Make vision board your desktop background or put it in a highly visible place in your house/bedroom/office

How do I accept the challenge and sign up?

Sign up here: http://tinyurl.com/af97hfk

*Giveaway opportunity, too*

How will I make my vision a reality?

You will get an e-mail once a month with a task to remind you to view your board and take action.

Grab button if you have a blog or website too!

Grab button if you have a blog or website too!
See sidebar for code.


Also, read Do you believe in The Secret? Making 2013 the Year of YOU!!! for more on the Secret and sample vision boards!

Do you believe in The Secret? Making 2013 the Year of YOU!!!

thesecret    The Secret is an ancient concept. It is not new by any means. It has stirred great controversy for some, particularly the religious. The question is, do you believe in the secret? According to The Secret, which involves the law of attraction is the belief that everything that you want is possible if you envision it first. It follows the cliché: If you can see it, you can be it, if you believe it, you can achieve it.

There is truth to the secret, except it really isn’t a secret at all since people have known this for centuries. So then why is it called the secret? Perhaps because most people fail to believe in it. I for one, believe it, wholeheartedly. I have seen its power. Most likely because I am a dreamer. I am a doer. I am a thinker. I am an achiever. I believe inside and out that I am great. I believe strongly that I am to be loved, respected, wealthy, and thankful! I believe all people should live good lives, and that all people can be great. I’ve always believed that. Maybe that’s why I am a teacher by day and a women empowerment blogger by night. It is all aligned because I believed it, I prayed about it, I worked towards it, and because I ENVISIONED IT!



It is my belief that thoughts become things. Thoughts are real! The fact that you can visualize in your head how people look or act or how what I read in a book looks in real life is not a coincidence. The fact that tons of women envision what their ideal man will be like or the wedding day is not a coincidence. Though we get mad if we don’t get that. That doesn’t mean the secret is failing us. That means we have not aligned our thoughts with our core values and beliefs. It means we are not being totally REAL with ourselves. I am guilty of this in certain areas of my life such as my health whereas other areas such as my career I am a rock star at this!

Anything you want to change about your life can be done! It all starts with you. It starts with you recognize the not so secret to having anything you want in life. This simply means you need to get clear with yourself about WHO YOU ARE and WHAT OU REALLY WANT YOUR LIFE TO BE LIKE. Then visualize it!

What do you look like at your ideal weight?

What does your future husband look like?

At your day job, how do you really want to feel?

When you look at your bank account, what do the numbers look like?

A goal is just a wish until it is written down, and without a vision the people perish. Perish no more my friend!

Get with it in 2013. Hell, why not start now!

Regal Realness will be starting its first Regal Girl Challenge:

“2013 Vision Board Challenge” in one week!

Join our e-mail list in order to be a part of it: http://eepurl.com/nOBS9

Look out for an e-mail with more information!!!


Vision Board: A vision board is a collage of images, pictures and affirmations of your dreams and desires






When you actually let your dreams out and put it to paper you would be amazed at what you accomplish!


Are you up for the challenge?

Are you ready to unleash all of your SECRET dreams and desires to the world so you can start making BIG moves in 2013?

Color Me Confident: 4 Ways to Increase Your “Regal Realness”


“To be regal is to be worthy. To be real is to be authentic. Let real recognize real. Excellence should always be at the top of every girl’s list”

Regal Realness is about staying true to your self—the real you (culture, identity, heritage) while empowering you for the throne as the regal (empowered, educated, motivated, and determined) woman you are. It is about staying true to yourself but becoming a women of excellence all at the same time.  We believe that you don’t have to give up who you are or where you are from to become a woman of great character, of great morals, of great presence, of great intelligence, and of great success.

 Here are four ways to increase your confidence at any age and tap into the “regal” being inside of us all:

1. Find a Mentor

Find a person who can lift you up. Find a person who you look up to. You should always surround yourself with people who are your equal or above. “Iron sharpens iron.” If you want to be ‘regal’ then you have to spend time with regal women who are role models. Spending your time with the wrong people could cost you big time in the long run. I learned in 7th grade that, “if someone shows you their friends—they’re showing you there future.” Only hang with individuals who will take you to the next level and/or encourage you where you are.


 2. Master your Thoughts

If you master your mind, you master your life. If you can control your thinking you can be anything you want to be and have anything you want to have. Why do you think there are some people who are billionaires at 14 like Farrah Gray while others are 68 and still struggling to make a dollar. Circumstance, socio-economic status, race, gender, disability, neglectful or absent parents, etc—none of those are excuses! There are millions of people who succeeded despite these categories we are pushed into. If you want to master your thoughts you need to create daily affirmations to tell yourself daily. Essentially, you want to “fake it till you make it.” Your mind doesn’t know the difference. The more you say it the more you will start to believe it. It is cliché but it is true: If you believe it then you will be it! Real Talk: You wouldn’t believe all of the good things that will begin to happen as a result of saying affirmations daily.

One of my daily affirmations: I have a vision, determination, and inspiration, as well as massive amounts of self-esteem and self-confidence.

3. Create a Vision Board

Vision Board Example from: browngirlnextdoor.com

Vision Board Example from: browngirlnextdoor.com

“Without a vision the people perish” the Bible said it best. You – Vision = Perish, Dreams Deferred, Unhappy, and the list goes on. If you want to see different results then you have to do something different. We all have a vision inside of us of who we are and who we want to become. Sit down one night or day, grab a couple of magazines or pictures from the internet and cut out images that represent the life you envision yourself having. Make it beautiful-regal but keep it real with all these—YOU! Put the images on a poster board, cork board, or any other space (even on your computer background) you have to make it visible daily. It will remind you of where you are headed and keep you focused. I have been using vision boards for 2 years, and they are a success!

4. Speak Up

Everyone has a voice inside of them. Use yours! Speak up if these suggestions aren’t working. If you are doing everything you can to be happy, to succeed in school or work, to get a boyfriend who loves you for you and makes you happy, to get the healthy hair you want, to be fit and go to the gym but none of these things ever seem to happen then it is time you ask for help. Then it is your time to speak up!!! YOU ARE WHO YOU’VE BEEN WAITING FOR!!!

Audre Lorde said it best, “When we speak we are afraid our words will not be heard or welcomed.
But when we are silent, we are still afraid. So it is better to speak.”



CONFESSION: I Have an Addiction and I’m Not Ashamed to Admit It!

Yes! Who would have ever thought I would have an addiction. Well, I do. I am officially suffering from ‘pin-itis.” I am addicted to Pinterest and I won’t be seeking rehab anytime soon. Dr. Drew cannot even help me! LOL

Pinterest has changed my life. I urge you to create one if you haven’t already. My addiction actually saved my life! It has revamped my thoughts, actions, and beliefs. It allows its users to pin on board all things of their particular interest from food, relationships, wedding ideas, future home décor ideas, classroom ideas, clothes ideas, party planning ideas, date night tips, favorite sayings and quotes, etc. Pinterest has helped me stay more committed to my vision, my mission, my purpose, and my passions in life!

By seeing visual representation of things I love daily it inspires me to be a better person, and to actually try things out and actually LIVE! I see everything I’ve ever dreamed of and more on Pinterest. Pinterest is essentially virtual vision boards. They help you SEE who you are and what you like visually.

Once you can SEE it you can BE it! There is truth to this cliché.

The pins and boards on Pinterest remind me that anything is possible, and that there is still much to life to be lived, cooked, coordinated, planned, experienced, tasted, loved, enjoyed, created, beautified, and designed in each of our lives! It inspires me to use my God given gifts and talents MORE, and to try things I would have never done before. I believe the ideas I get from there allow me to see the life I want more clearly, and the things I want to try are laid out so it diminishes fear of what can really be accomplished if we give time to our interests, passions, and purpose.

If you really want to start LIVING, and DOING ALL THE THINGS YOU’VE EVER DREAMED OF, and CREATING THE LIFE YOU’VE ALWAYS WANTED…I highly encourage you to get a Pinterest account, and start pinning your way to the life you want. However, I will point out that you should prepare to spend countless hours on here, but if you are I would also recommend that you follow through with actually trying out something things you PIN rather than just pinning them and leaving them behind.

With that being said, the start of this new addiction is only a click and a ‘pin’ away. Go get it! www.pinterest.com

Your empowerment is only a click away, follow me at: http://pinterest.com/regalrealness/

With Love,